I Did Everything Wrong


Over the last couple of months I’ve had dreams featuring my dead father (he died 6 years ago) including one very vivid one where I walk into my parents' bedroom and the atmosphere was, for want of a better word, actually creepy. I notice my dad is present and it hits me, ‘He’s here! But he’s dead, this isn’t right! I must talk to him, this is the Holy Grail!’ I felt a great deal of emotion, but crucially I had no conscious lucidity. He walked from the room without speaking and I started shouting at him to wait. It was then my wife woke me, I had been crying out in my sleep. 

A few weeks later I had the lucid dream. This is what happened:

The dream started with me waking up in a hotel room, looking long and hard at the alarm clock, deciding, ‘Yes, I will wake up, waking up is what I should do…’

Soon I’m walking with a crowd into a seated conference room. Strangely, I remember many in the crowd were grumpy about my presence, whispers of ‘He shouldn’t be here’ drifted in the air. A bit strange.

A friendly person took my arm and shepherded me inside. I immediately felt more relaxed. He brought me to my seat, and it was then I saw that I was being seated next to my dad. He looked younger, middle aged (my age). And he was vivid compared to the other grey, brown figures (I don’t recall the friendly ‘shepherd’s’ face at all). It was then that it happened, I thought clearly to myself, with great excitement, ‘This isn’t right, I only see my dad in dreams.’ It then hit me like a bolt of euphoric lightening and I shouted out, ‘I am awake!’ I was lucid. I want to stress how euphoric the feeling was, it felt like a great amount of adrenaline was coursing through me.

In hindsight I can speculate that ‘dad’ was created by my subconscious to wake me to lucidity, or I guess it’s possible ‘dad’ might have actually been his consciousness/soul, passing through dimensions in an attempt to connect with his son - so bearing in mind that within the lucid dream I was suddenly face to face with my dearly departed father, a man I would have done anything to be able to speak to over the last seven years… So what did I do? Full of zapping energy, I completely ignored the man, immediately sprinted out of the building, looked at the skyline and shouted, ‘FLY!’ I took off, Superman-style, flying around a shining glass city scape.

So, this is the ‘head scratcher’ part: There was thunder in my ears, I felt a total rush. I could also feel something pulling at my leg, slightly weighting me down. I looked down to see a woman, flying also, hanging onto my foot. She had the face of a jovial girl I had known as a child. She wore a green frock and daisy chain headdress. I’m ashamed to say I started to kick at her face, trying to dislodge her. She was weighing me down! I kicked at her and managed to smash her off into the side of a building. Why was she trying to curb my enthusiasm? 

I shouted, ‘SPACE!” and immediately started to rocket vertically up into the clouds. I felt her again. I looked down, she was gaining on me. 

I was then falling, like a skydiver, dropping like a stone, getting battered by turbulence. She had gone, but I was falling, helpless. It was the greatest noise, like a hurricane. I wasn’t scared, it was all I could do to hang on and endure the ‘wind tunnel’ violent vibrations. I thought I opened my eyes and I could see my arms flailing in front of me. Deafening noise. (There was a strange split-second flash or feeling of my brain being inserted into my skull and then my skull top being put on!) Then my eyes opened for real. I think I saw a few flashes of light, then stillness. My arms were by my sides. It’s hard to believe they hadn’t been waving around. My dog was happily asleep, laying over my leg. He hadn’t stirred. My wife was asleep beside me, I hadn’t even cried out.

I don’t know if I was about to have an OBE, but I do think that the key to successful lucid dreaming is to remain calm and take control. I did everything wrong.

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